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newcomers-msg - 2/24/08

 

How to make newcomers to your group confortable. Integrating newcomers.

 

NOTE: See also the files: 4-newcomers-msg, Getting-an-AoA-art, SCA-intro-art,

SCA-trans-msg, intro-books-msg, names-FAQ, courtesy-msg, SCA-courtesy-art.

 

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NOTICE -

 

This file is a collection of various messages having a common theme that I  have collected from my reading of the various computer networks. Some messages date back to 1989, some may be as recent as yesterday.

 

This file is part of a collection of files called Stefan's Florilegium. These files are available on the Internet at: http://www.florilegium.org

 

I  have done  a limited amount  of  editing. Messages having to do  with separate topics  were sometimes split into different files and sometimes extraneous information was removed. For instance, the  message IDs  were removed to save space and remove clutter.

 

The comments made in these messages are not necessarily my viewpoints. I make  no claims  as  to the accuracy  of  the information  given by the individual authors.

 

Please  respect the time  and  efforts of  those who have written  these messages. The  copyright status  of these messages  is  unclear at this time. If  information  is  published  from  these  messages, please give credit to the originator(s).

 

Thank you,

    Mark S. Harris                  AKA:  THLord Stefan li Rous

                                          Stefan at florilegium.org

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From: DICKSNR at qucdn.queensu.ca ("Ross M. Dickson")

Date: 4 Jul 91 14:53:00 GMT

Organization: The Internet

 

Greetings to the Rialto from Sarra Graeham, courtesy of Lord Angus:

 

Yaakov HaMizrachi comments upon his first event, the courtesy and welcome

he found there, and that he thinks it unfair to dump the responsibility

for training newcomers on existing group members who might be shy and find

it beyond their abilities, so long as there are other courteous people to

take up the slack.

 

He is right, in the ideal case.  But I think this, the most common view

on the best way to train newcomers, is damaging in any group where the

longtime members are "cliqueish".  This includes the case where they are

too shy to make new friends easily, as the two cases can't be told apart

by the newcomer, and cliqueish behavior is often impossible to see from

the inside.  (Everybody who's never run into an SCA group that behaves

like this, raise your hand!  :-)

 

Ideally, training newcomers is best taken up by everyone in a group, where

everyone who runs into them is helpful, answers their questions, lends

them what they didn't know to bring, rescues them from social gaffs ("Ah,

dear, that's the King you're about to present that cloved lemon to, and

the Queen is right beside him. ..."), etc.  But in the real world, groups

get too big and people get too busy to be able to notice newcomers among

the other noise and bustle.  Usually in any one group there are a few

people who take up the slack, official Chatelains/Gold Key or not, but

they can get tired or tell the newcomers all the wrong things ("Yeah, the

SCA's really great, everybody wears bunnyfur bikinis, drinks their guts

out, and you wouldn't believe the willing babes! ...").  I'm sure most

groups do a very good job, or the SCA wouldn't still be a courteous place

with steadily increasing membership, but judging by the social dynamic of

a few places I've visited, there's still much to be done.

 

This is why I feel it's important for longtime members to take an active

role in the training of newcomers; hospitality is in fact one of the Peer-

like qualities.  I made a long, impassioned posting on this topic earlier

this spring, but the Reader's Digest version is that if we want to shape

the Society into a courteous and authentic place, the longtime members who

know what's what have to make sure newcomers know what the Society's aims

and goals are, and that we are *not* a fantasy society, that we are *not*

a slavishly authentic society with a focus on one time and place, that we

*don't* want to recreate the evil politics of the period, and so on.

 

So the clever reader might be asking, "How do we do this?"  I got asked

the same thing at a herald's meeting the other week, when I suggested that

the heralds had a lousy reputation because we were the only group in the

SCA who regularly told people they couldn't do what they wanted to do.

My answer to, "How do we fix it?" was to say that the heralds should get

in on the training of newcomers, and make sure that every newcomer who

joins the SCA knows that they must choose a name and device that could

have, but didn't, belong to a human being before 1600.  If the newcomer

knows this at the beginning, they probably won't become attached to some-

thing inappropriate, and they will have no real quarrel with the heralds.

(We *should* be training our pursuivants to do this, but that's another

posting.)

 

This is what I think should happen in every major field of Society endea-

vour, from behavior at an event, to making garb, to cooking feasts, to

the honour system in fighting, and beyond.  We should help our newcomers

discover the information they need to function as contributing members of

the SCA *before* they make their mistakes.  In Greyfells, we started off

our last batch of newcomers with two special meetings for them, the first

where we discussed courtesy, social conduct, and what they needed to bring

to their first event.  At the second meeting, we told them to bring fa-

bric, we supplied the sewing machines, and a dozen newcomers made their

own first garb with experienced canton members to guide them along.  So

now they had three things, appropriate garb of their own for their first

event, the knowledge of how to make more (especially relevant if they'd

never seen a sewing machine before), and most importantly, a feeling that

people in the SCA give their time and talent to help others.  That last is

crucial if the volunteerism that runs the SCA is to continue in perpetua,

with or without awards to spur it on.

 

I understand Yaakov's concern about asking busy SCA members to do more.

But I think that's the short term view.  In the long term, the only way

to get relief is for there to be somebody willing and able to take up the

reins when you falter, and that's what training newcomers is all about.

If there's nobody there, you keep working, or the group dies.

 

I'm afraid I've run on again, but I really feel quite passionate about

this topic.  If the SCA is not to devolve into armed camps of "Us" vs.

"Them", the longtime members have to take some type of responsibility for

training the next generation of SCAdians.  If we don't, *someone* will

make our newcomers feel welcome, and it just might be the beer-swigging

bunnyfur barbarians that we don't talk to either.  If we *do*, there are

rewarding relationships to be formed with people who are still excited

about the things that caught our imagination when we first found this

company many years ago.

 

     Sarra Graeham, Canton of Greyfells    |  Heather Fraser

     Barony of the Skraeling Althing       |  Kingston, Ontario, CANADA

     Principality of Ealdormere, Midrealm  |  c/o dicksnr at qucdn.queensu.ca

 

 

From: aluko at leland.Stanford.EDU (Stephen Goldschmidt)

Date: 16 Oct 91 22:28:14 GMT

Organization: Stanford, Pren Tal, Mists, West

 

In article justin at inmet.camb.inmet.COM (Justin du Coeur MKA Mark Waks) writes:

>We *do* usually tell them that they should go get a name posthaste, and

>recommend pretty strongly that getting a device is A Good Thing. Indeed,

>some people make it sound like the novice should get themselves a name

>before even contemplating participation in the Society.

 

I'm not sure who "we" are in this excerpt.

My own recommendations would be:

(1)  Choose a GIVEN name before your second SCA gathering and have it

     checked at your first opportunity, to see if it will be registerable;

     or, even better, choose it with the help of a name-herald.

(2)  Don't worry about the REST of your name (or trying to register

     it) until you have been active for a year or so or you

     need to register a device.

(3)  Register your DEVICE before sewing a banner or painting a shield,

     or when you are granted arms (or expect to be soon).

 

There is no reason for someone to consult on a device at their first

event; indeed, it may be a turn-off for some newcomers. However,

newcomers usually need immediate attention from the heralds to help

them choose authentic GIVEN names, unless they are going to go around

using an unofficial nickname (or their legal given name) for the rest

of their days in the SCA.  A GIVEN name is virtual requirement for any

kind of social activity in the Society, and it is very hard to change

once it becomes known.  Believe it or not, a given name that sounds

perfectly good to modern ears may turn out to be a problem when you go

to register your full SCA name later.

 

Iulstan

 

 

From: SAUNDRSG at QUCDN.QueensU.CA (Graydon)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newcomers

Date: Mon, 06 Sep 93 13:35:57 EDT

Organization: Queens University at Kingston

 

tbarnes at silver.ucs.indiana.edu (thomas wrentmore barnes) writes:

>        Do people have any ideas on how to integrate new folks into an

>established group or for how to make new people feel welcome?

Well, the short answer is to find them something to do that they think

is fun a few times, and they'll stick thereafter if they're interested.

The longer sugguestion is to run a garb making session (it helps to

have someone volunteer to go cloth shopping with them, too), and to

get one or two experienced people to do 'Event Enjoyment 101' (calling

it 'event survival' can give entirely the wrong impression!)

The topics I cover in EE101 are - this is not a clique, if you don't

talk to people, they assume you *want* to be sitting quietly in the

corner; the existence of all the sub-groups who do specific things;

the constraint of reality (if you're going to claim it, you have to

do it, too); and that participation in everything is volunatary (no

one can do everything, so look around and try stuff until you find

something that you like; people who insist that you *must* (who

aren't running the event) may well be having a politeness leak).

Graydon

 

 

From: sclark at epas.utoronto.ca (Susan Clark)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newcomers

Date: 6 Sep 1993 14:22:36 -0400

Organization: EPAS Computing Facility, University of Toronto

 

Greetings.....

      As a person who just finished up a spell as my group's chatelaine,

here's a few things I found work:

 

      1.  For transplants,the main problem will probably be the one of

      fitting into a new group after being well-established in

      another one.  These folks will probably not need all the info a

      rank newcomer will,  but they should be made to feel welcome

      and become acquainted with your group (size, barons n' stuff, who

      does what, etc.) A good way to get acquainted is to ask 'em stuff

      about their old group and what they did in it.  As soon as you

      find out their interests, let them know of practices, cool people

      to talk with....and find a way to let them start using their talents.

 

      2.  New people are going to need a variety of things.  Af I usually

      give them the basic intro (format of meetings, basic philosophy,

      etc.), let them use the Known World Handbook, and then ask them

      if they have any particular interests.  I then send them to folks

      who can help them get involved with these interests.

 

      For both groups, the most important thing is making them feel welcome.

      This means that if you're showing them around at a meeting, you

      don't abandon them and go talk to your friends, and it also means

      introducing them by name to as many people as you can.  Offerrs

      of help in making garb or finding gear is also nice.

 

      Of course, orienting newcomers should not be just one person's job.

      You probably know who the people in your group are who are friendly,

      helpful, knowledgeable, etc. are and who those are upon whom you

      should never foist an unsuspecting newcomer.

 

Hope this helps.

regards

Nicolaa/Susan

sclark at eps.utoronto.ca

 

 

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newcomers

From: mlitchfield at pimacc.pima.edu (R. Michael Litchfield)

Date: 7 Sep 93 22:00:35 -0700

 

tbarnes at silver.ucs.indiana.edu (thomas wrentmore barnes) writes:

>     Do people have any ideas on how to integrate new folks into an

> established group or for how to make new people feel welcome?

 

If you are really serious about it you should take a look at why you keep

losing them. Usually it is not something you can do anything about, either they

don't know why they left or can't explain it, or what they object to is so

pandemic or entrenched in the society that you can't change it. In any event it

might be worth talking to some of the newbies that walked away and find out

why.

 

If you want to work on some of the symptoms because you can't do anything about

the problem there are a couple of things you can try that might help.

 

a) Have an established member adopt each newbie. Give the newbs someone who

will look out for them and someone they can goto for help. Someone who will

help them get to events, help them do things at the event and to get them

involved in the local groups activities. The drawbacks with this are a tendancy

to involve the newbie in the political pissing fights of thier mentors and a

serious problem if the newbie nd mentor don't click.

 

b) Take them shopping. Have someone take the newbie out shopping to get all the

things they will need to play in the society. Feast gear, garb or cloth for

garb (if you just get bard you have to stay with them until it gets made into

garb, and not just t-tunics and gypsy pants), camping gear, things for keeping

busy, etc. You have to be honest with them and tell them that this is an

expensive time consuming process, figure at least $100 and two weeks at a dead

minimum, and probably more of both.

 

c) Give them something to do. THey need to have something to do during the day

at events (Helping, music, crafts, games, fighting, drinking), something to do

during the night (dancing, music, sucking up to brasshats, drinking), and

something to do when they are home (fighter practice, Arts, Crafts, political

bullshit, drinking). Ideally they should get a chance to try as many possible

things as they can so they can see what they like.

 

d) Try to encourage a cameraderie amoung the newbies, so that they have a peer

network. The society can be an increadibly unfriendly place so it REALLY helps

to have someone who you know and can talk to.

 

e) COMMUNICATION! A monthly newletter is not enough, make a special point of

calling each newbie and tellign them about anything going on they might be

interested, offer them rides, TALK to them.

 

>     Lothar \|/

 

-Michael

 

 

From: mittle at panix.com (Arval d'Espas Nord)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newbie Meetings: any ideas?

Date: 3 Oct 1994 15:40:07 -0400

Organization: PANIX Public Access Internet and Unix, NYC

 

Greetings from Arval! Gwenfrewi Afonlyn asked:

> I'm from the Shire of Afonlyn, Muncie, IN, and I was wondering if

> any of you kind gentles floating on the electronic sea might have

> suggestions or ideas about newbie meetings.

 

To start with, don't call them "newbie meetings".  "Newbie" is a cacaphonic

word, and can be off-putting.  And it is neither medieval nor

medieval-sounding.  Try "newcomer".

 

The best way to get people interested in the Society is to get them doing

something interesting.  At every meeting, your shire should do something

real: a workshop, a dance practice, a bardic circle.  Hold a class at every

meeting, and invite in the best artisans from neighboring groups to teach.

Make something at the meeting: Get your local brewer to come lead a

workshop that actually ends up with a five-gallon batch of beer.

 

This approach will show newcomers what we really do, expose everyone to

more arts and activities, encourage people to meet one another and work

together, and create an incentive to finish the bloody business meeting

quickly.  Start the meeting at 7:00 and schedule the class for 8:00.  If

the meeting isn't done at 8:00, remind the officers that the Society is for

_doing_ stuff, not talking about it.

===========================================================================

Arval d'Espas Nord                                         mittle at panix.com

 

 

From: sclark at epas.utoronto.ca (Susan Carroll-Clark)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newbie Meetings: any ideas?

Date: 3 Oct 1994 23:44:19 GMT

Organization: University of Toronto -- EPAS

 

Greetings!

      More than any other one factor, what will get newcomers to stay

is one-on-one contact.  As it's commonly said, we're

all deputy chatelaines.  When I first joined,  many people went out

of the way to say "hello" and make me feel comfortable.  They found

out what I was interested in and introduced me to contact people.

The seneschal loaned me a Known World Handbook, which I (keener that I was)

read cover to cover one evening.  Another thing that

is useful this time of year is where we go around the room, introduce

ourselves, and say what we're interested in or working on--sometimes

with show and tell items.  Finally, rather than a meeting, IxD suggest

getting the new folks to their first event ASAP.  If it is next week,

loan them gear.  If it is next month,  help them sew their first gab.

If someone takes each newcomer as their charge at the

first event, being there to explain what court is and to answer other

such questions.

 

Cheers!

Nicolaa/Susan

Canton of Eoforwic

sclark at epas.utoronto.ca

 

 

From: corun at access1.digex.net (Corun MacAnndra)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Re: Newbie Meetings: any ideas?

Date: 3 Oct 1994 19:43:07 -0400

Organization: Express Access Online Communications, Greenbelt, MD USA

 

Deny thyself the spoils of personal licentiousness. <00eenepsa at bsuvc.bsu.edu> wrote:

 

[snip]

 

>tad dry and the attrition rate is getting unsightly. Does anyone

>have any suggestions?  Experiences?  Ideas?

 

In the Greater Storvik/Ponte Alto area, we hold what is known as the

Sumposion Oikomenikon. Don't ask me who thought up the name, but it's

loosely referred to as Y'all Come To The Party. I took over hosting

these in my home in Storvik after the previous host was stricken by

a serious bout of Mundanitis, and the meetings lapsed. In short, there

are two meetings held each month for newcomers, and I have been working

with the folks in Ponte Alto (we used to be one Big Barony, but the

DC, Suburban Maryland, and Norhtern Virginia area is sooooo big, that

a split was necessary), and we discuss the same topic on both sides

of the river (that's the Potomac), so that if anyone misses one meeting,

they can go to the next one.

 

What follows is a list of the subjects we've covered in the last year

or so:

 

      Beginning Garb and Accessories

      Camping in the SCA

      Martial Arts in the SCA: Archery, Duello and Heavy

      Household Structure, Awards, and What to do in Court

      Choosing a Personal Device, and Other SCA Heraldry

      Arts and Sciences: What are They

      How to Get Involved in the Society and What to do at Events

      History and Geography of the Society

      Choosing a Name and Persona

 

We ask various of the oldtimers who are well versed in these topics

to come in and talk about them and answer questions. Our newcomers

go away with a sense of accomplishment and enthusiasm for new projects.

The pizza people make a bundle, and everyone's happy.

 

You might want to bandy this idea about at your next business meeting,

but be forwarned, you'll probably end up taking on the task by default.

You know how these things work ("What a great idea. Why don't you organize

it"). ;-) Just remember, have fun with it.

 

Corun

===============================================================================

   Corun MacAnndra   |

Dark Horde by birth |        Marion Barry....a mayor with conviction.

   Moritu by choice  |                        seen on a bumper sticker in DC

 

 

From: folo at prairienet.org (F.L. Watkins)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

Subject: Newcomer Seminars (Was: Newbie Meetings...)

Date: 3 Oct 1994 22:52:13 GMT

Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana

 

While walking that thin line between informative and just plain