Ode-to-1994-art - 1/11/17
"BoD Shuffled Their Books" by Baron Karl Faustus von Aachen.
NOTE: See also the files: SCA-hist2-msg, SCA-stories1-msg, border-stories-msg, Politics-SCA-art, Fndng-T-Dream-art, Confrontation-art, Concnsus-Mkng-art.
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Mark S. Harris...AKA:..Stefan li Rous
stefan at florilegium.org
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BoD Shuffled Their Books
by Baron Karl Faustus von Aachen
The Board of Directors of the SCA, known as the BoD, went through a time of megalomania in 1994, beginning with their threats to ban non-members from all SCA events, and culminating in their resignation and/or impeachment and a newer, friendlier, more accountable BoD taking their place, to everyone’s immense relief. This is to the tune of God Shuffled His Feet, by The Crash Test Dummies.
[mid-1994]
After thirty years,
they got quite scared,
so BoD said,
“Let us calm our fears,
make some new rules,
to cover our heads.”
They gathered up
some lawyers from outside,
created edicts
and sat back for the ride.
The people read their mail,
once it got there,
and asked them questions
like, “Can we get to read
all your records
of the problems?
And if my name
got taken off your roll,
would I be still allowed
to get in past the troll?”
BoD shuffled their books
and ran around
in fright.
The people reached for swords
and made their plans
to fight.
So BoD said,
“What if there’s a boy
who picks up
a feast knife?
“To him, it is a toy
till he falls down,
risking his life!
“We thought of how
his friends would come to sue.
Would we have enough
to see a lawsuit through?”
BoD shuffled their books
and ran around
in fright.
The people reached for swords
and made their plans
to fight.
The people stood staring
in every kingdom,
every shire.
But BoD kept screaming,
till someone asked them,
“Where’s the fire?
“Not quite sure,
the reason for the fuss.
Are we on LA Law
or aren’t you one of us?”
BoD shuffled their books
and ran around
in fright.
The people reached for swords
and made their plans
to fight.
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Copyright <year> by Paul Sleigh, PO Box 393, Geeveston, Tasmania 7116, Australia. <bat at flurf.net>. Permission is granted for republication in SCA-related publications, provided the author is credited. Addresses change, but a reasonable attempt should be made to ensure that the author is notified of the publication and if possible receives a copy.
If this article is reprinted in a publication, please place a notice in the publication that you found this article in the Florilegium. I would also appreciate an email to myself, so that I can track which articles are being reprinted. Thanks. -Stefan.
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