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Stefan's Florilegium


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SCA-stories4-msg - 5/23/11


SCA stories related after 1/1/2009.


NOTE: See also the files: SCA-stories1-msg, SCA-hist1-msg, you-know-msg, placenames-msg, vanity-plates-msg, child-stories-msg, border-stories-msg.





This file is a collection of various messages having a common theme that I have collected from my reading of the various computer networks. Some messages date back to 1989, some may be as recent as yesterday.


This file is part of a collection of files called Stefan's Florilegium. These files are available on the Internet at: http://www.florilegium.org


I have done a limited amount of editing. Messages having to do with separate topics were sometimes split into different files and sometimes extraneous information was removed. For instance, the message IDs were removed to save space and remove clutter.


The comments made in these messages are not necessarily my viewpoints. I make no claims as to the accuracy of the information given by the individual authors.


Please respect the time and efforts of those who have written these messages. The copyright status of these messages is unclear at this time. If information is published from these messages, please give credit to the originator(s).


Thank you,

    Mark S. Harris                  AKA:  THLord Stefan li Rous

                                          Stefan at florilegium.org



Date: Wed, 11 Feb 2009 13:34:45 -0600

From: Kihe Blackeagle <kihebard at hotmail.com>

Subject: Re: [Sca-cooks] mushrooms

To: SCA Cooks <sca-cooks at lists.ansteorra.org>


Kihe Blackeagle wrote:

<<< Great rule of life, and I quote: "There are NEVER enough mushrooms!" --

attributed to a Princess of Cynagua, or somewhere out there in the West

(I learnt it of a Bard resident in Cynagua, along with an *excellent* story

to accompany the adage: there were *almost* enough mushrooms, once upon a time . . .) >>>


Okay, smart guy, now you have to regale us with the story or we will all

be awake all night, trying to image how many tonnes of mushrooms were

involved here. Please?




Oh, drat.  Here I was hoping to winkle out some additional detail from someone who was actually *there* ... which detail I would gladly re-integrate with the bones of the tale which follows.


The tale more or less as I tell it, then, in brief:  

A whim / decree had gone out from the throne in the Principality, in the voice of the Princess herself, that "There are _never_ enough mushrooms".


A plot was hatched.  ("We'll show *her*!")  An event was chosen, and the plans finalized.  Purchases were made.  Much anticipatory glee ensued.


The morning of the event dawned -- cloudy, misty, moisty, foggy, almost-not-quite-rainy, and COLD (for the area / time of year).  The populace on the whole was unprepared, and shivering.  Spring & summer cloaks in their kits, a forecast having been for a fine, bright day.


However, the weather wasn't REALLY bad enough to cancel the event, now was it?


Opening court ensued, and -- after collusion on the part of the court heralds, one presumes -- a Presentation was made to Her Highness:  several full CASES of mushrooms.  Ten?  More?  (Some details did not come to reside more permanently in my memory, for which I beg your pardon.)


The assembled waited, the Princess thought fast on her feet, and decreed that, this once, there were ALMOST enough mushrooms -- and then bid the whole lot of the fungi arrayed in their several cases be conveyed to the cooks for the creation of hot soup.  


Which was, considering the conditions of the day, the ultimate victory of the whole proceedings, as the gathered populace were well and truly warmed to their depths of their cockles (and muscles) with the ensuing bounty of the kitchens.


Blame my memory if I got details wrong, bless Valadonis Stareagle, the Wanderer, for passing the tale along.  


And if someone else would care to cover the Pun Tax, I'd certainly appreciate it.



Kitchen Idiot


ttfn - Mike / Pax ... Kihe / Adieu, Amra



Date: Mon, 9 Feb 2009 12:34:18 -0500

From: Audrey Bergeron-Morin <audreybmorin at gmail.com>

Subject: Re: [Sca-cooks] How do you answer such a question

To: Cooks within the SCA <sca-cooks at lists.ansteorra.org>


<<< Gunthar then asks her "Whether it is more important to wash

dishes or be in his court". >>>


I would have taken it as jest from his Majesty, and answered something

along the lines of "Why, to wash dishes, of course!"


But something similar happened to me recently, as I was working in the

kitchen during court. The local Baron sent a messenger to the kitchen

(and the messenger happened to be one of those people who relishes

protocol, courts, and all the associated power and grandeur) to tell

us that our good Baron didn't wish anybody to be in the kitchen if

they'd rather be in Court, and that we should feel free to get out of

there for a few minutes to attend Court. We looked at each other, and

I remember answering something like "Thank you for the gracious

thought, but I'd rather stay here". The look on the messenger's face

was absolutely priceless!



From: SPaterson <sjpaterson at EASTLINK.CA>

Date: January 6, 2010 2:03:26 PM CST

To: CALONTIR at listserv.unl.edu

Subject: Re: [CALONTIR] pronouncing fighter names correctly


<<< should have made the subject line "pronouncing fighter names right" rather than "pronouncing fighter names correctly".  If the fighter doesn't recognize his name, then the herald mispronounced it, regardless of the "correct" pronunciation.



Battleur >>>


This reminds me of a Pennsic story. We have a local fighter 6'7+ and skinny so he looks taller. When he joined there was a guy John and a bigger guy named John (Big John) coming to fighter practice. So, Yesungge being Yesungge dubbed him Big Damn John ( a la BDR).   It stuck.


At a tournament at Pennsic he filled out his name at the list table and waited for his name to be called. The herald hesitantly announced "Big ahhh John, who should change his name".  John, puzzled, asked, "What is wrong with Big Damn John?" The relieved herald answered " I thought it was "Big Dong John" - and thus BD John's porn-name was born :)


Thus the reasoning behind Dorcus' request I am guessing.   (And EK Crown Tourney Heralds rarely got Yesungge's name pronounced correctly our first 6 years here).





Date: Tue, 26 Jan 2010 12:54:31 +1100

From: "C Lenehan" <lenehan at our.net.au>

Subject: Re: [Lochac] Google Map of Lochac

To: "The Shambles: the SCA Lochac mailing list"

      <lochac at lochac.sca.org>


Stefan wrote:

<<< I believe both Trimaris' and the Principality of Oertha's claims both

pre-date yours.


I can't currently find the Trimaris claim, but here is some info from

this Florilegium file: >>>


Sorry Stefan.  Trimaris was briefly granted Ynys Rhew in error (they lost or

forgot the original claim).  I proved both prior claim and occupation and

the BOD overturned their mistaken ruling at their next meeting many years

ago. Ynys Rhew is forever an inalienable part of Ynys Fawr.  Others can

claim all they want.  It holds no water.  We have pretended to allow some

leeway on this in wars, but the actual title deeds are ours and will remain

that way.



Strategos tous notious okeanous



Date: Mon, 25 Jan 2010 21:02:08 -0800 (PST)

From: tracey sawyer <tfsawyer at yahoo.com.au>

Subject: Re: [Lochac] Lochac Digest, Vol 14, Issue 184

To: lochac at lochac.sca.org


<<< I thought Baron Arnfinr and his Ynys Fawrians won that battle... or am

I out of date? >>>


No, merely mistaken <g>. As is Stefan with his suppositions that

either Trimaris or Oertha have valid prior claims. Nor An Tir either.


Fortunately, it is all laid out with immense clarity and authority by

the noted war trophy and dual citizen of both Ynys Fawr and Southron

Gaard, Master Hrolf Herjolfssen:




In this case, you will see that the victors of Festival War 2006 did

not write the history.<end snip>


Please send this to the Florilegium or somewhere easily accessible - so that all other kingdoms may also know of "our"* RIGHTFUL claim...??



*by 'our' I mean of course 'yours - as part of Lochac' therefore also 'ours'... if you can make head or tail of that... :-)



From: Tracy Craig <astrolabe_cat at yahoo.co.uk>

Date: 13 February 2010 01:59

Subject: [SCA-adamastor] Fame!

To: sca-adamastor at hivemind.net


The SCA features on the Darwin Awards



Mairi Jean



Date: Wed, 17 Mar 2010 16:41:47 -0400

From: Saint Phlip <phlip at 99main.com>

To: Cooks within the SCA <sca-cooks at lists.ansteorra.org>

Subject: Re: [Sca-cooks] Getting Proactive,     question for folks from

      the Middle


<<< The year the hornets won the field battle at Pensic and where the Scot got

stung? >>>


That one IS true, except it was the Woods Battle, not the Field Battle

(a lot of hornets and ground bees up in those woods some years.) and

several gentlemen have been stung "there", and didn't have to be Scots

to accomplish it. I know for fact, because I handed the ice pack to

one poor guy, who was in full armor, with straps blocking any

reasonable access to the area (although I did not apply the ice pack

for him.)


Saint Phlip



From: Amber Hallacy <darkdragontribe at GMAIL.COM>

Date: July 12, 2010 10:38:12 AM CDT

To: CALONTIR at listserv.unl.edu

Subject: Re: [CALONTIR] Fwd: Here's one for the Belly Dancers


Okay, this brought on an attack of the giggles as well as some old memories of when I had a kid try to rob me in my old store....using a kitchen steak knife. Came right up behind me and told me he wanted the money from the till. I told him where the money was and as soon as he turned his back (note to would be robbers-never turn your back on who you are trying to rob....) I looked to the wall where hung a broadsword, battle mace and other sharp pointy things. Grabbed the closest item (the mace) and swung it over the kids head, screaming like a bean sidhe. The poor kid soiled himself as he ran from the store. (second note to would be robbers-never mess with a woman who keeps medieval weaponry on the wall.....)

The cops were a bit flustered and amused...


"You chased him out of the shop with what? Mace? If you sprayed him with mace, he shouldn't have got far...."

"No, not pepper spray, A mace. big stick, spiked iron ball...."

" Oh my God...you didn't hit him with that, did you?"

"If I'd have hit him with it, he' still be here and I'd have to clean the carpets."

I've always wondered what that poor kid thought when the little old lady he thought would just hand over the cash suddenly went Boudicca on him.  :-)  Same with the Lady belly dancer with the sword....you know that the robber had to be thinking that this was seriously f%&*$# up..."this just ain't normal".

Nadirah, who has raised too many kids to be afraid of a teenager with a steak knife.

On Sat, Jul 10, 2010 at 5:13 PM, Stefan li Rous ‪<StefanliRous at austin.rr.com>‬ wrote:

<<< From the Gleann Ahbann list.


I don't think she is an SCA person, but it shows that some of those SCA urban legends could be true...




Subject: Here's one for the Belly Dancers

Posted by: "ibriham2000" lhollar at comcast.net ibriham2000

Date: Fri Jul 9, 2010 4:23 pm ((PDT))




THLord Stefan li Rous    Barony of Bryn Gwlad    Kingdom of Ansteorra

Mark S. Harris           Austin, Texas          StefanliRous at austin.rr.com >>>



From: Amber Hallacy <darkdragontribe at GMAIL.COM>

Date: July 13, 2010 12:37:46 PM CDT

To: CALONTIR at listserv.unl.edu

Subject: Re: [CALONTIR] Fwd: Here's one for the Belly Dancers


On Mon, Jul 12, 2010 at 3:14 PM, Stefan li Rous ‪<StefanliRous at austin.rr.com>‬ wrote:

<<< Thank you, Nadirah.  But what kind of store were you running where you had a broadsword, battle mace and other pointy things on the wall?


Stefan >>>


Just an eclectic sort of gift shop...very Celtic oriented, as that was my interest and focus back in the 90's. (My persona was Celtic at that time as well, not having shifted my interest to the Middle East yet) We sold silver jewelry, clothing, books, incense, and pretty much anything we thought might sell. Including sharp pointy things...

The funny thing is that the poor kid who tried to rob me had been egged on by his friends, and had been told "They're Wiccans...they believe in that Harm None stuff..she'll just give you the money.....we dare you to do it"

*sigh* Don't know why people think that if one is Pagan, one is automatically Wiccan. I'm NOT Wiccan, and so do not feel bound by any "Harm None" philosophy. Mess with me or mine, and you see the Celt come out to play. My version of the 3-fold Law has always been that if I fold you in 3's, you won't bother me anymore.  ;-)

So the poor child was somewhat astonished that the sweet little old lady he thought ran the shop suddenly turned into a screeching madwoman swinging a mace at him. When the police caught up to him, he was still babbling about the crazy lady who tried to kill him....




From: Jennifer Carlson <talana1 at hotmail.com>

Date: July 14, 2010 3:27:23 PM CDT

To: <ansteorra at ansteorra.org>

Subject: Re: [Ansteorra] I have a question


I first approached the SCA almost thirty years ago because I was a nut for history and there weren't many outlets for it available to a high school student.  At my first event, someone made a smart-alec crack about me, and almost instantly a young man who barely knew me tackled the rogue and wrestled him in the red Namron dirt - ruining his brand-spanking-new velvet doublet in the process.  For me.  The SCA won my heart that day.




<the end>

Formatting copyright © Mark S. Harris (THLord Stefan li Rous).
All other copyrights are property of the original article and message authors.

Comments to the Editor: stefan at florilegium.org