Stefan's Florilegium

SCA-stories3-msg

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SCA-stories3-msg - 2/21/00

SCA stories related after 5/1/96.

NOTE: See also the files: SCA-stories1-msg, SCA-hist1-msg, you-know-msg,
placenames-msg, vanity-plates-msg, child-stories-msg, border-stories-msg.

************************************************************************
NOTICE -

This file is a collection of various messages having a common theme that
I have collected from my reading of the various computer networks. Some
messages date back to 1989, some may be as recent as yesterday.

This file is part of a collection of files called Stefanąs Florilegium.
These files are available on the Internet at: http://www.florilegium.org

I have done a limited amount of editing. Messages having to do with
seperate topics were sometimes split into different files and sometimes
extraneous information was removed. For instance, the message IDs were
removed to save space and remove clutter.

The comments made in these messages are not necessarily my viewpoints. I
make no claims as to the accuracy of the information given by the
individual authors.

Please respect the time and efforts of those who have written these
messages. The copyright status of these messages is unclear at this
time. If information is published from these messages, please give
credit to the orignator(s).

Thank you,
Mark S. Harris AKA: Lord Stefan li Rous
RSVE60@email.sps.mot.com stefan@texas.net
************************************************************************

From: jeffebear1@aol.com (JeffEBear1)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: YKYITSCAW
Date: 23 May 1996 13:18:12 -0400
Organization: America Online, Inc. (1-800-827-6364)

In article <1010.6715T595T854@serv.net>, maj@serv.net (Marnie Fiamengo)
writes:

>Or the time that I called 911 to get a cop to come break up a domestic
>dispute so that the woman could get to the emergency room ...
>
>911 op: "Are there any weapons in the house?"
>
>me: "Of course."
>
>911 op: "Is he threatening her with one?"
>
>me: "Yes, that's why I called!"
>
>911 op: "What kind of gun?"
>
>me: "Guns?! No guns, those are dangerous."
>
>911 op: "Huh? Then what do you mean by weapons?"
>
>me: "Oh you know, swords, knives, daggers, maces, war axes, pike staves,
>Korean chopsticks, ... stuff that can kill..."

ok another cop story..... Stopped for headlamp being out. I'm in the
passenger seat in garb (coming back from a event). Cop leaninggggg in
the open window (like a chicken with his neck exposed to me) staring with
big eyes down my front (bodice d-cup need I say more). he wanted to know
where we are going etc.
after 15 minutes (they have been putting my friend, the driver, through
the paces because they have never seen a albino before and his "eyes
looked weird") the cop asks me to get out. I do and his eyes get
huuuugggge. "put your arms up!" * what huh?* and I do. He tries to pull
my dagger out of the sheeth at my waist. It's peace tied and he can't. So
now he is tring to figure out if he can ask me to take my belt off and
have my skirt fall down(the tie was gone so I had just tucked it in that
day) without him getting in trouble for haressment, plus he just realized
I could have slit his throat any time as he was craning in the
window...........after everything I was asked why I didn't think to tell
the cop I was armed. Because it never occured to me! It wasn't like I had
a sword on........................who's afraid of a little eating knife?

Morigianna (who now carries all blades in the trunk)

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
From: bq676@torfree.net (Kristine E. Maitland)
Subject: Re: YKITSCAW...
Organization: Toronto Free-Net
Date: Thu, 6 Jun 1996 18:10:32 GMT

Larkin O'Kane (larkin@webstar.net) wrote:
<snip>
: But then maybe I'm just getting old.
: Larkin O'Kane, Trelac, Ansteorra

No, dearest. Age is not relevant here, though admittedly there are days
when you get the feeling that you've been in the Society too long...

Case in point: two years ago (when I was young, stupid and lonely) I was
on one of those "chat-lines". I was speaking to an Aussie who was
visiting Toronto on business, & who was bored out of his tree. He sent me
a message asking, "So what do you do for fun?" I replied, "well on
weekends I hang around men who like to get into armour and beat
each-other's brains in with sticks."

His response to that was, "Funny, I didn't think that there were branches of
the S.C.A. in Canada..." [turns out that his girlfriend was a costuming
laurel from Down Under]

The Known World is an EXTREMELY small place.

Ines Carmen Maria de Freitas

From: ALBAN@delphi.COM
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: *That* look
Date: 7 Jun 1996 20:27:34 -0400
Organization: The Internet

Ines Carmen Maria de Freitas said:
>The Known World is an EXTREMELY small place.

Right. There I was, visiting Edinburgh, summer of 1990. I was
walking from my hotel toward The Main Shopping Street, when
I pass a small store that read Scottish Celtic Armoury; I figure it
has knives, and the initials spell SCA, so it's worth at least
looking in. I walk in; the store has a case and a half of good
knives, swords, sgain dubhs, and the like. The proprietor walks
out after a minute or so; I tell him I'm just looking. He tells me
from my accent I'm obviously American. We start chatting. He
tells me he likes Americans, and, in fact, he'd spent the previous
summer's vacation in Pennsylvania. I ask, politely, having been
there, where exactly?
He says western Pennsylvania. My grin starts up.
Really? Isn't that a coincidence, I say. I've been there, too.
He continued. There was this "rather odd group of Americans"
he'd come across, and had I ever heard of it, it was called the
Society for Creative Anachronism? He'd spent his vacation
selling and talking about cutlery there. . . .
We spend 20 minutes talking about the Tuchux, and Mistress
Morganna the troll person who'd checked him in, and this and
that and the other.

I travel 5,000 miles to get away from it all for a week, and wind
up with the SCA....<sigh>

(And, to tie loose ends up, I'd heard about him from
Morganna...She remembers him, because there were two
gentlemen from Meridies, with rather thick Tennessee accents,
doing troll duty with her; she was stuck translating from
Edinburgh English to Tennessee English and back again....)

Alban, who thinks the SCA is even more widespread than his
parents' relatives. (Don't ask.)

From: nuala@ix.netcom.com(nuala)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: freak check and VA cops
Date: 4 Sep 1996 15:55:17 GMT

greetings good gentles...

>In <50iqp3$8pj@juliana.sprynet.com> shaggy01@sprynet.com (Wil
>Chrapcynski) writes:

>How many [of] you have experienced being pulled over by a police officer
on
>the way to an event or a faire just because you were dressed in garb
>and that you looked funny?... What makes
>the matter worse, is that if they pull you over they feel that they
>must give you a ticket for something...

I've heard a couple of stories along that line from friends, though
it's never happened to me... one time it was, "Do you have any weapons
in the car?" "No. I mean, uh, wait, I forgot about this knife that I
just won in a tournament." "Whuuut?" (by the way, this happened in
VA. what Irene said about Virginia cops is almost always true: thick
drawl, thick skull when it comes to the concept of the SCA... sometimes
you're pleasantly surprised, though.)

another time some friends were on their way to an event. they weren't
in garb, but sometimes being a bunch of young people in one car can get
you pulled just as easily.

"What's that thing in the back of your truck?"
"What thing?"
"The stick thing."
"Show me what you mean."
"No, don't get out of the truck. Just tell me what it is."
"If you tell me what it looks like, I will."
"About nine feet long, with a football-shaped thing wrapped in duct
tape on one end and a trailer hitch cover on the other..."
"Oh, that's a polearm."
"Whuuut?"

nuala of the Red
nuala@ix.netcom.com

From: auslan94@matrix (catherine auslander)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: YKITSCAW
Date: 6 Sep 1996 20:07:10 GMT
Organization: SUNY New Paltz

About a year ago a friend of mine went looking for an event that
was in his home town. He (of course) didn't have directions, but figured
if he wandered around long enough, eventually he would find someone in garb.
and sure enough he did. he then approached the gentles with the intent of
asking directions... but they were ACTUALLY in a play. :)
-Aislinn...:)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Katie Auslander
auslan94@matrix.newpaltz.edu "Buildings burn, people die, but
a.k.a. Aislinn true love is forever."
purple is good. -The Crow
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

From: MegLach@msn.com (Lovebirds )
Subject: Re: You know you're a Stick-Jock when....
Date: 5 Oct 96 11:05:32 -0700
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca

When you get into an altercation where you work, you are slugged
across the jaw with a clean shot. You look at the guy, and you say
"that was light, MiLord, and I thinkest this will not be!".

Actually happened. I got suspended without pay for a week, he was let go.

I went easy on him. After all, I was taught to be honorable.

Lachlann

From: moondrgn@bga.com (Chris and Elisabeth Zakes)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: You know you're a Stick-Jock when....
Date: Tue, 08 Oct 1996 14:45:33 GMT

MegLach@msn.com (Lovebirds ) wrote:

>when you get into an altercation where you work, you are slugged
>across the jaw with a clean shot. you look at the guy, and you say
>"that was light, MiLord, and I thinkest this will not be!".

>Actually happened. I got suspended without pay for a week, he was let go.

>I went easy on him. After all, I was taught to be honorable.
>Lachlann

A friend of mine had gone to a bar & grill after fighter practice; he
still had his cup in, although he was wearing passably mundane
clothes. In the course of the evening, he noticed a fellow being
overly persistent with a lady at the bar. My friend went over to help
her out. The bad guy turned around and kicked him in the crotch. My
friend looked down, looked at the bad guy and said "Is that your best
shot? I'll give you two more, and then I'll take one."

The bad guy decided it was time to leave.

-Tivar Moondragon
Ansteorra
C and E Zakes
moondrgn@bga.com

From: Tara Seides <tara@eb.com>
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: You know you're a Stick-Jock when....
Date: Thu, 17 Oct 1996 16:56:24 -0700
Organization: Encyclopaedia Britannica

Thorgrim wrote:
>
> In article <3263622F.1B32@vision-inc.com>, petere@vision-inc.com wrote:
> >> ....when you get duct tape in your Christmas stocking!
> >
> >So, um... that would be odd?
> >
> ><his eyes shift nervously>
> >
> >Guess I better take all these rolls of stocking stuffers back to Home
> >Depot. Darn it, what will I get the guys now?
> >
> ><shuffles off to return several rolls of duct tape>
> >
> >For the Dream,
> >Rünwulf
> >Kingdom of Caid
>
> Strapping tape always makes a nice gift, should
> you feel the duct tape inappropriate ;-)>

One year, I got my (then-) boyfriend a "fighter's repair kit". It
consisted of a roll each of duct tape, strapping tape and electrician's
tape. :-) Much to my surprise, I got the same thing in my stocking, as
did my mom! Boy, what a family! :-)

Marsali MacLiammoir mka Tara Seides
of Haus Drachenholt tara@eb.com
Barony of Calafia, Caid San Diego, CA

From: salley@niktow.canisius.edu (David Salley)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: Sign Language in Court???
Date: 3 Nov 1996 01:07:00 GMT
Organization: Canisius College, Buffalo, NY 14208

DeeWolff (deewolff@aol.com) wrote:
: I have the privilege of residing in the East, where there is a wonderful
: herald who signed just about every court I have attended. I unfortunately
: do not know her name, but I sure the current royals do......

She's Lady Cedar. Pennsic Court was wonderful this year. The herald called
*her* into court to accept a service award. She was in full "In the ears, out
the fingers" mode when she suddenly realized she was signing her own name!
She stopped cold, stared at her hands for a few seconds, then turned to the
herald. The entire court was grinning at her. The applause for her was
thunderous!

- Dagonell

SCA Persona : Lord Dagonell Collingwood of Emerald Lake, CSC, CK, CTr
Habitat : East Kingdom, AEthelmearc Principality, Rhydderich Hael Barony
Internet : salley@cs.canisius.edu (Please use this, reply may not work.)
USnail-net : David P. Salley, 136 Shepard Street, Buffalo, NY 14212-2029

From: moondrgn@bga.com (Chris and Elisabeth Zakes)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Confusing the Mundanes (was Tweaking. . .)
Date: Sun, 29 Dec 1996 05:35:50 GMT

My favorite story has got to be the time I was flying out of the
Houston airport in full Elizabethan garb. I was checking out the books
in the airport gift shop, rounded a corner and confronted the
salesclerk. She dropped her jaw, picked it up and asked ". . .uh,
aren't those the kind of clothes they wore back in the, uh, 1920s?"

-Tivar Moondragon
Ansteorra

C and E Zakes
Tivar Moondragon (Patience and Persistence)
and Aethelyan of Moondragon (Decadence is its own reward)
moondrgn@bga.com

Organization: University of Maine System
Date: Thu, 2 Jan 1997 22:36:39 EST
From: joe dupere <DUPERE@MAINE.MAINE.EDU>
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: Tweaking the mundanes...(used to be something else....)

A while back, I was at fighter practice one evening, which was being held
in the field house at the local college. I was holding my own against
all the young pups, but, discretion being the better part of valor, I
decided to let the young fellows wear themselves out a bit on each other.
(Not that I'm old, mind you, but there is quite a bit of grey in my beard
and hair these days). I decided to wander over to the other side of the
field house and get some cold water from the fountain. Ah, you should have
seen me! I cut such a dashing figure strolling around the indoor track.
Beads of manly persperation bejewelling my brow, my long curly hair
gently blowing in the breeze created by the runners on the track. My new
surcoat (gules, a chevron argent(which, by the way conflicts with three
dead knights from several hundred years ago)) richly contrasting with my
black armor. With my articulated knees and elbows clanking pleasantly in
my ears, I bestowed smiles upon all the comely lasses I saw on my stroll.
At the water fountain I drank deeply of the cold water, and turning away
I came face to face with a campus policeman, who was staring at me.
"We've had reports from several women about an old guy dressed funny
lurking around the gym" he said, still staring at me. "Have you seen him?"
All I could say was "No sir, I haven't!" He turned to leave and said,
"Well, If you do, give us a call, we don't want that kind of trouble
around here."

I was pretty sure it wasn't me they were looking for, but still, if a
middle aged grey-haired man in a suit of armor doesn't fit the description
"an old guy dressed funny" I'm not really sure I want to know what does!

Jehan FitzAlan

From: gbrent@rsc.anu.edu.au ()
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: tents at Pennsic or other events
Date: 9 Jan 1997 23:40:07 GMT
Organization: Research School of Chemistry, Australian National University

> > From: bronwynmgn@aol.com
> > For one thing, as someone else noted, there is no such
> > thing as privacy at Pennsic. Tent walls block no sound at all, tents
> > shimmy nicely with certain movements, and there are few places at Pennsic
> > where you can not expect to be backlighted at least once a night by
> > campfires, lanterns or car headlights.

>(puzzled look) My tent (both my first 8x10 and the 12x16 monster tent I
>currently use) never (ahem) shimmied while they were being used in the
>pursuit of recreational activities. (and believe me, I can get pretty
>recreational.. (G) I solved the backlighting problem long ago by hanging
>drapes inside my tent on all four walls.. they're made from cheaply
>purchased Burlington drapery fabric remnants, with a white vinyl lining.
>Car headlights can hit 'em, you won't see anything. And they really make
>the inside of the tent look more like a pavilion.

Ah, backlighting... To play in a tent is fine. To play with the light on
is chancy. To play with the light left on when your tent is visible from
the tavern is... well, likely to increase your recognition factor.

I was searching for garb in my tent one night, with the light on. A
bunch of my friends were drunk outside, and from the comments they
seemed to think they were seeing a shadow-play _much_ more exciting than
anything I was actually doing. So I decided to add some variety. It took
them about ten seconds to realise that they were now watching a duck
make its way across the tent. ;-)

GtQ

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
From: Paul Kay <paul.kay@lincroftnj.ncr.com>
Subject: Re: Collecting Scadian Folklore
Organization: N&SM
Date: Wed, 12 Mar 1997 21:02:58 GMT

I am not sure how welcome this will be, but I have a few pieces of data
that might add to the discussion. I know, facts might get in the way,
but here I go...

rebecca fildes wrote:
> RLKP88A@prodigy.com (Connie Collins) writes:
> >Well how about some really bad jokes? Most of these were told to
> >me as true stories that happened to somebody who was a friend of a
> >friend but they've all acquired punchlines over the years.
> >
> >A fighter with a new motorcycle decided that he was going to take it
> >to the local war to show it off to his good buddies. [snip]
> > "Don't worry, I'm a nurse!"
> >Can you blame the poor motorist for fainting?

When I herd it (and as I tell it :*)), this is an exageration and
understatement both. The armor was his new chain mail and he was
wearing his bascinet, with his shield across his back. Much simpler
armor than described.

The person I heard it about was Andrew of Seldomrest - a real nurse. He
saw the accident stopped to help and found the driver unconsious. The
driver woke up while being examined to see if he could be moved. That
is when he saw a Large man in armor who said "Don't worry, I'm a
nurse!" Andrew seemed to have forgotten how he was dressed. The man
passed out again.

Another Andy story (even less sure of the provenence):
There was a prison uprising at his work-place. As I heard it, some of
the prisoners figured on making an escape shielded behind the "pansey
male nurse" and threatened Andrew with a broom-stick that they would
beat him up if he gave them touble. He disabused them of that notion
and returned them to the guards.

Afterwords (as I heard it), he went into the warden's office with the
broom. He complained about the accessability of the handles. He ended
by rising up on his toes and smashing the broom handle down on the
warden's riot helmet while saying "You could hurt some one with one of
these!" Both the handle and the helmet broke.

> As a side note, the motorcycling fighter is the SCA equivalent of
> an 'urban folktale'.

Or it has become one, having happened in AS single digits and being told
by loudmouths like me. :*)

From another thread, there was the discussion a while back on the "What
would you like to eat?" "Meat!" "Um, what kind?" "Cooked!" joke.
Someone pointed out they had heard it attributed to Tom Troll in early
days. (If you do not have that one, it should be fairly recent in Deja
News). I heard the same from several sources who claimed to be there
(and were his friends). It happened somewhere around the founding of
the Middle Kingdom in timeframe, and has grown and spread through being
told by... but I repeat myself.

And still another from another thread today (on fencing in the Middle,
of all topics):
Matthew Saroff wrote:

> My guess is that hairline fractures of fingers and hands are not
> uncommon, and frequently unnoticed, particularly for people who fight
> polearm and great weapon. I have heard a story about a woman who fought
> heavy who went to the ER as a result of a workplace accident, and got a
> finger set. The doctor then asked her about the other 8 times that she
> broke her hands.

This happened when Fern was learning bastard sword. She recounted it
while asking for pointers. This was around 1980/81. In those days,
hockey gloves _were_ hand protection and only really good swords had
barn door handles as knuckle protection.

Her hand hurt, so she thought "Why not use my employer's clinic?" and
went to the staff clinic at MSU.

The doctor looked at the X-rays and asked if she played hockey.

He was the trainer for the hockey team and had only seen that sort of
injury there. When he showed her the films and pointed out the next
most recent one she said " Oh, yes, my wrist was a bit weak last January
and February!" (As she was telling it she use a wondering "Oh, wow! sort
of tone.)

This encouraged several of us to make hand-shields.

Last is one I have always liked. I have no idea on the provenence. The
original was attributed (again) to Tom Troll.

Tom was going through Detroit Metro Airport and was accosted by some
Krishnas. They were persistant and he was feeling puckish so he played
along when they refused a brush off attempt. Eventually, they were so
convinced they had him going that they invited him to the temple.

"We will have a love feast there." says one.

"What will you serve?" asks Tom, mildly.

"Wholsesome foods! Organic vegatables, rice soups. Delicious!" was the
answer.

"Will you have potato salad?"

"Um. No."

Standing up to his full height and expanding his chest to look hugely
threatening, Tom shouted "No potato Salad! That's no Feast! I'm not
going if there is no potato salad!"

The Chrishnas beat a hasty retreat.

There are several even more appochriphal follow on stories, but this has
probably been boring enough.

Bart the Bewildered (and his fly paper memory)
Carillion, East
--
Paul Kay
NCR
Lincroft, NJ paul.kay@lincroftnj.ncr.com

Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: Pools
From: Holly_Sullivan@elric.maximumaccess.com (Holly Sullivan)
Date: Wed, 19 Mar 97 11:22:42 PDT

> djheydt@uclink.berkeley.edu (Dorothy J Heydt) writes:
> >"...to lifeguard at the pool..." gosh, how strange that sounds.
> >I can't tell from your post where you are; where are you, where
> >most events are held by a pool?

> From: fivegates@aol.com (Lady Kara)
> MUST be here at home in Trimaris. I was just advising one lady the other
> day who just moved here from the East, regarding fabrics tolerable in
> Trimaris's heat and humidity. I also told her I had seen times when it
> was so unbearable that court was held in the Pool.

(G) I remember that. I also remember an event some years back.. coming
off the list field in full armor, on a typical Trimaris day (hot!!!), Duke
Merowald walked into the deep end of the pool. He proceeded to make a trail
of bubbles up the center of the pool as he walked along the bottom to the
shallow end. Upon climbing out, he turns to the group and says "AHHHH,
that's better" and continues on his way down the hill to his tent.

Let me add that I have never seen a group of SCAdians shut up so fast as
when Merowald first stepped into the pool. (g)

(Missy Atalaya, I seem to recall you were in the pool that day. :)

:)---Holly---<--<-@ * San Diego, CA * Warning: .sig ahead! :)

From: whheydt@slip.net (Wilson Heydt)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: Gulf Wars
Date: 30 Mar 1997 21:15:44 -0800

Andrea Thompson <andrealt@ix.netcom.com> wrote:
>>*******Don't take lanterns into tents if your're making woopie. What I
>>*******learned at Gulf Wars.
>
>At least, not unless you wish to *share* your woopie with all in the
>general vicinity.....<G>.

Reminds me of what I was told by former Principality Constable of Cynagua...

Outside of a tent in which the occupants have been noted to appear to
be having a *very* good time...repeatedly...

Lady: You guys should keep it down in there.

Man in tent: You can't make us! I'll tell the constable to make you
leave us alone!

Lady: Start talking.

Man in tent: Oops.

Hal Ravn Hal Heydt
Mists, Mists, West Albany, CA

Date: Tue, 06 May 1997 10:49:34 +0000
From: Ghislaine Fontanneau/Elayne Hoover <elyh@wcc.net>
Organization: Law Offices of Smith-Smith-Wilson-&-Bootsie
To: ansteorra@eden.com
Subject: Re: SCAdian vs mundane (living among the sheep)

Once upon a time, an SCA sword merchant (don't know his name, but he
sells for M.A.S. weapons and may I say they are very good quality
weapons!), we'll call him lord Bob, moved into a new mundane
neighborhood. Now, Bob spends so much of his time traveling to events
to sell his swords that he had to take off Fridays and Mondays. It got
to be such a hassle, and he was making lots of money in the merchant
trade, that he just quit his job. When he moved into the new
neighborhood, he had no job outside of SCA merchanting, wore mostly half
garb (Cavalier shirt and bluejeans, or the like) all the time, and of
course, had more swords on his walls than most grandparents have
photographs. His neighbors were intimidated by this scrawny short man
with swords.

One day in his 'on the border of the inner city' neighbor hood, two
rival gangs decided to rumble in neutral territory: Bob's front lawn.
Bob was awakened out of a lovely sound sleep (it was still noon) and was
not happy about the arrangements of the two rival gangs. There were
young children living next door! His neighbors may not like him, but he
is an honorable man... Bob dressed, and grabbed his big, real-steel
claymore, and strode out his door. He planted his two feet firmly on
the ground and shouted for all to hear, "No-one has a knife fight on my
front lawn unless I get to play too!"

Now, at least two of these kids lived close enough to Bob's house to
have seen him practicing on the pell. They didn't know at the time why
he was beating an upright log with a duct-taped stick, but when they saw
him standing with that claymore propped up against his shoulder, the
edge glinting in the noon day sun, they began to be enlightened. They
encouraged their gang friends to leave Bob's front yard...soon.

Later that day, after the danger had passed, Bob heard a knock at his
door. It was one of his neighbors with a casserole in her hands, "We
weren't too sure about you when you first moved in here, but now we
think you're okay!" she announced proudly. Soon she was followed by
another neighbor, and another casserole, and another neighbor, and
another casserole....

From: "J'lynn Yeates" <jyeates@bga.com>
To: ansteorra@eden.com
Date: Tue, 6 May 1997 11:39:22 +0000
Subject: Re: SCAdian vs mundane (interactions)

Two summers back was taking advantage of a cool saturday morning by
staying late in bed with a lady friend ... until i hear a knock at
the front door (left open to cool house).

Due to nature of the pastimes at hand, all i was wearing was
my pentacle, so garb pair shorts and open vest and wander into living
room (wandering where the bloody hound is .... who was *supposed* to
be guarding the porch as was his normal habit.)

There, in the middle of the living room i find a old guy in a
dark suit, clutching a bible, his back to me, goggling about the
swords & axes & shields & spear racks ....

Being more than a little annoyed with someone *in* my house, i
exclaim "What the HELL are you doing in my house!"

He spins around (almost falling over) and sticks out hand ... "I'm
the rev. "something". Your door was open so i thought i would
come in and welcome you to our congregation".

My considered reply, "GET OUT!" At this point he sees the
naked woman woman behind me, but quickly focus's on the penticle and
starts stammering. Being a old-guy without a clue, he get's one
more chance "LEAVE NOW!" ... nada

As i am walking to him, i pick up a leaf-blade short sword i was
working on off the bench and walk him (backwards) out of my house at
swordpoint ... while companion is giggling madly.

About all that came to mind at the moment to say (in all seriousness)
"Damn, i knew i should have gotten the screens up, the damned
baptists are getting in" ... At which point she went into hysterics
... *then* the hound showed up and took up his normal place.

To this day, when same person does his "rounds", he gets to my
property line and moves to the center of the street.

Have also found it to be of value to clean & sharpen spears or
blades on the porch when the Jehova's Witnesses are working the
block. For some reason it keeps them away.

'wolf

[The mentioned "hound" is a large wolf/dog mix. - Stefan]

From: seeker17@ix.netcom.com (Michael J. Watson)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: 'Ellen' episode & recreationists
Date: Thu, 06 Nov 1997 15:31:48 GMT
Organization: Safe Haven Products

liran@mail.tdl.com (lea bob ) wrote:
>Chendra Conklin <cac59@pantheon.yale.edu> wrote:

>>I just watched tonight's episone of Ellen - which was a hysterical
>>commentary on the recreationist culture. I could see every line
>>happening at an event...... I think that our version of the stockade
>>would probably be a minivan though....
>>
>>-the redhead-
>>
>>Chendra Conklin

>"all right, men. form up the shield wall. we'll advance to the 7-11,
>capture the parking lot & then wheel about to form a corridor. the
>archers will cover us & Lord HumptyScrunch here will run in & make the
>beer purchase. does everyone have their cup on? Humpty - got your
>i.d.? then, for Honor & Chirvalry, lay on!"

>liran

Oh my.

Liran, I thought I was going to die laughing when I read your
response. After an event a number of years ago about six of us
stopped at a 7-11 to get beer and chips for a party/revel. When we
walked in we descovered weąre not in Kansas any more. We were in a
gang hang out with about a dozen dudes in colors. We were of course
in costume. We did something very much like what you discribed!

We didn't balk, formed a defensive position, advanced on the cooler,
got our stuff and retreated from the convenience store in good order but
only the broadswords at our side and our strange behavior detered
them.

As for the ellen episode I must admit it was funny. I don't like the
show usually. I live in dread of the day some sitcom adds a character
who is in the SCA. I think the exposure we get will not be worth the
sitcom portrayal of our decidedly odd lifestyle choices. But think of
the costumes!

Date: Fri, 29 Aug 1997 18:53:36 -0700
From: Cynthia Virtue <cvirtue@ricochet.net>
To: sca-arts@raven.cc.ukans.edu
Subject: Re: SCA ULs

Carol at Small Churl Books wrote:
> If some version of it can be authenticated (first hand, not
> friend-of-a-friend), Professor Jan Harold Brunvald at the University of Utah
would
love to have the information.

I can't do that one, but I can vouch for the following:

My cousin was posted to an aircraft carrier two years ago. There was a group
of SCA folk who regularly had practices on the flight deck. An SCA-specific
bit of military protocol was approved: Fighters in armor *should not* salute
their superior officers. Too many people were ending up with mild
concussions, abrasions, etc, from saluting, helms off, gauntlets on.

If the professor wants specifics on this (contact info for my cousin, etc), I
can provide that.

Yep, this is 'arts.' Ya, um, Storytelling! Um, Armor Design! Yep.
---
Lady Cynthia du Pre Argent, Minister of Silly Hats, Crosston

Date: Fri, 29 Aug 1997 19:21:33 -0700
From: Brett and Karen Williams <brettwi@ix.netcom.com>
To: sca-arts@raven.cc.ukans.edu
Subject: Re: SCA ULs

Once upon a time I knew a young knight, by the name of Marshall of Eaglesbane.
He had done me the honor of fighting for me in Western Crown tourney, back in
my youth. Our paths eventually parted years ago, as paths do, when he was
posted to Germany as an artillery officer-- a lieutenant.

As I later heard the tale, Marshall's commanding officer got wind of his unusual
hobby. During the course of the Twenty Questions Session that followed,
Marshall explained the symbolism of the SCA knight's white belt, chain and
spurs-- the oath, and the fealty it represented within the Society.

The commanding officer promptly got out a pen and a piece of paper, wrote
furiously for a moment, then handed Marshall a small set of standing orders,
together with the directive to post those orders inside the tank so that all the
crew could see why their lieutenant was deliberately breaking the uniform
regulations.

You see, Sir Marshall had been ordered to wear his knightly belt, chain and
spurs while on duty in his tank...

ciorstan

Date: Fri, 5 Sep 1997 23:50:51 -0500 (CDT)
From: "J. Michael Shew" <jshewkc@pei.edu>
Subject: Re: SCA ULs
To: Eloise Beltz-Decker
CC: Mark Harris, Katherine Estep, Carrie K Sanders, Meliora & Drake,
DianaFiona@aol.com, fiondel@i1.net, rmcgrath@nfsa.gov.au

Warning: These tales are not authenticated. They are Mythos
generated within the SCA and may not be true. But, shucks! They are good
stories anyway!

Do not reffer to these as true tales. Instead, think of them as
SCA Myths. We deserve a few...

The SCA and Rock and Roll

(source, an interview with Stevie Winwood)
Stevie Winwood, when still playing with the super-group Traffic,
was touring the US on a long and extended set of dates. He was in the
back of a Limo stuck in traffic, (Pun inserted here) and noticed some
funny people cavorting in a park in the LA area where he was. Near the
road, a "kid" as he called him, was strumming a guitar while dressed in a
jester's costume. Winwood rolled down the window to listen in and heard a
tune he kind of reccognized, but could not put a finger on. The traffic
snarl cleared, and he continued on his way.

When he reached the concert hall, he could not get the tune out of
his mind. He continued to hum it, asking everyone in the band if they
knew the tune. They could not identify it, but it seemed familiar...

Later, when they had ended the tour, they found the song, and it
was decided they would try to play it for a lark. The audiences in their
own home area, (England) found it wonderfull, so they included it on the
next album. Before they finished the recording session, it was the title
track.

So a western bard inspired the "John Barleycorn Must Die" album...

A Knight-Baronette in the SCA
(Told to me by a participant.)

A Court Baron was active in a distant land, (He was in the SCA
and in the US Marines for years.) Stationed in Japan, he tried very hard
to come up with fun events in his shire. The best idea he had was the
Highland Games they proposed to have on a spring date. The event was
several months off, so the word leaked out and a Japanese High school that
they regularly did demos for offered to serve as a location and to provide
some of the "atmosphere" by training their band to play Bagpipes.

The Baron was horrified by the thought of teenage Japanese
Bagpipers, but he agreed. Oddly enough, the kids did allright, although
they only knew two songs and played them quite often.

A variety of games were offered, with the Caber toss, (Using a
section of telephone pole), putting the stone, (Using a "stone" of
concrete with a cast in handle and the high school's high jump pole,) and
a trowing event using a very heavy rock they found on the site.

Several passers-by stopped to watch, and a lot of them found it
interesting. Suddenly a largish, blond man stepped out of the crowd and
asked to join in. He begged the use of a plaid table cloth they had,
improvised a great kilt, and entertained them all with a full-blown
routine of being a highland scot noble of the 1300's. He was so
convincing and was so knowlegeable that they begain to believe he was SCA
material!

He won the caber toss, came in second in the stone, and won most
of the other events. The local group did have the information and the
right, (As they were awfully isolated from the crown,) to give AOA's so
they set about creating a scroll to award the newby.

One of them engaged the new guy in conversation, to ferret out
what SCA name he would use. He replied, "Oh, I'm (name witheld),
Knight-baronette." The information gathering individual pointed out that
titles were earned in the SCA, and that there was no Knight Baronete in
the Society.

At this point the individual said "What's the SCA?"

It seems the person WAS a Knight-Baronette from Scotland...
(Addendum: I was shown the photo that was recieved a month later.
It clearly shows a man standing beside his mantle. Above it is the family
crest, a title from the Queen of England, and the Charter for his lands.
Anmong them, in the largest frame, is a Xeroxed SCA awards scroll. He
said it was the only title he had ever really earned...)

Please Refrain from Killing The Stars....

The Kingdom of Calontir is located in the Midwest, where people
don't act rude as a mater of course. The movie "Henry V" was showing at a
rather staid and conservative theater in the most conservative area there.
Many SCA folk had come to view the film, but as is the custom, none of
them wore garb and therefore few if any knew others were there.

The film was watched in silent awe. When the climatic battle was
joined, the fierce combat was observed by dozens of potential SCA
combatants.

Suddenly a new angle was flashed on the screen, and it was obvious
to the not-so-mundane viewers that the French attacker was less than
skilled. Almost in unison twenty voices said: "I could take him!"

Silence follwed. No further comment was made. Most of them
ducked out in the darkness during the closing credits...

(Not me. I sat there and counted the SCAers as they went by!)

Mikal
____________________________________________________________________________
Herra-Domr Mikal the Ram; an annoying Bard of no redeeming qualities

Date: Tue, 9 Jun 1998 17:48:25 -0700
From: kat <kat@kagan.com>
Subject: SC - re: A Gentle's Good Deeds

There are dozens and dozens in my years of SCAing; but I'll simply tell you my
favorite:

I finally, finally convinced my mom to go to an SCA event; after her many years
of "expressing concern" <I'm being polite ;-) > about my
"unsavory" hobby. It was a Coronet; but instead of a Tournament of the Roses on
the side, they held a Tournament of the Chocolate Chip
Cookies (hey, who are we to argue with a princess's whim?)

My mom and I settled under our Barony's "y'all come" sunshade and
watched the fighting. I could tell she was not going to change her
mind easily, no matter how wonderful everyone was being and how
colorful and fun the event was -- BUT THEN -- A young fighter came
up to my mom, got down on his knees, and proffered her a chocolate
chip cookie. He then explained the tradition to my mystified mom.
(Apparently, a knight who was lady-less for the day chose to win that
fight for her because she looked like she needed a smile.)

Her attitude rapidly changed from "your dippy friends" to "when's the next one?"
<hee hee hee!!!>

- kat

From: corun@access5.digex.net (Corun MacAnndra)
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: YKYISCA
Organization: We don't need no steenkin' organization
Date: Tue, 30 Jun 1998 12:01:31 GMT

<salley@niktow.canisius.edu> wrote:
>Toddler??? A toddler will pick the concept up by osmosis from his
>surroundings. What's impressive is when the _dogs_ learn what 'Hold!' means
>:-) :-)

Reminds me of a story some friends of mine from Ansteorra once told me.
They own a large Keish hound named Ceir (Gaelic for Bear and he is one).
They had Ceir at an event and were walking with some friends who also had
their smaller dog (sorry, type unremembered), when the Royal party walked
by. Everyone stopped to bow to Their Majesties Ansteorra, and at a signal
from the owners, both dogs dropped to the ground, paws outstretched in
front of them. The Seneschale (I think it was the Seneshcale) was reported
to have exclaimed, "My God, you've even got the dogs bowing!"

Corun

Date: Sat, 10 Oct 1998 09:48:46 -0700 (PDT)
From: Karen <tyrca@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: SC - chopsticks use?

And by the way, I think the funniest thing I saw in my earlier days in
the SCA was related to chopsticks. We had an individual, at the time
acting as the personal herald for the King and Queen who had a
Japanese persona. He was very studious about it, and was always in
appropriate garb. One Saturday morning, at an event, I passed the
Royal encampment, and saw him, already partially dressed in his
Japanese armor, eating breakfast. No one else was around in camp, and
I was simply on the way to the porta-john, but he was eating out of a
small rice bowl with lacquered chopsticks, and I laughed when I saw
that he was eating Fruit Loops cereal, and sipping the milk. Now that
is an interesting twist on persona play.

Tyrca
==
Lady Tyrca Ivarsdottir
AoA, OPN, ASTA, oleander
Barony of Elfsea
Kingdom of Ansteorra

From: Jim Fox-Davis <firedrake@earthlink.net>
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: YKYITSCA...
Date: Sun, 27 Dec 1998 16:47:03 -0800

JULIE ELAINE SIERACKI wrote:
> YKYITSCA when your helmet sits next to your helmet on your wall locker
> and you have to explain that you tried to register your sword with the
> Provost Marshal but they don't register 'knives' (so the arms room won't
> store it because you can't prove it's registered). Or when you are trying
> to explain a particularly nasty bruise or sprain to the medics. When
> someone asks you what unit you are in and you respond with your SCA war
> unit name, not your military unit. Been there, done that.

Many years ago, when I worked for the City of L.A., we altered the city records
of Lady Bevin Fraser of Sterling (Katherine Kurtz), to indicate military
service: Army of the West; conflict: Pennsic III.

Jared (ok, so there were three other SCA folk in the office, including the boss)

Subject: Re: True SCA Story
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 1999 06:35:46 -0800 (PST)
From: Julia Windsor <lywindsor@yahoo.com>
To: Merry Rose <atlantia@atlantia.sca.org>

The day of Crown Tourney, spring '94 Baroness Aileen stopped at an ATM
just off Ft. Bragg before picking me up in Raleigh at 4:00 AM. Three
very large guys sat in their car and watched her get her money. They
watched that is until she turned around to leave and they saw her very
real sword. They left without ever getting out of their car or
bothering Aileen.

As told to me by the Baroness herself,
Julia
==
Lady Julia Windsor

Subject: Re: True SCA Story?
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 1999 14:27:53 -0500
From: "E. T. Smith" <etsmith@compuzone.net>
To: Brenna <sunnie@exis.net>
CC: SCAVard@aol.com, atlantia <atlantia@atlantia.sca.org>

>Yes, but aren't urban legends fun. What about the one where the Russians were
>sending spy planes over to get pics of the manuevers on one of our aircraft
>carriers. One of the officers ordered all the SCAdians onboard to muster
>ondeck with all the heraldry and equipment they had with them and hold fighter
>practice.
>The story goes that they had a great deal of fun listening to the conversations
>the Russians had trying to figure what in the heck the Navy was training for
>this time.

It's not often that anyone can lend credence to an urban legend. In this
case, the aircraft carrier was USS Nimitz (CV-68), the officer was Captain Ed
Clexton, USN who was then commanding officer, and the SCA group was a Port the
name of which I cannot recall. Yea, verily. Captain Clexton had a lot of fighter
pilot moxie and really enjoyed seeing the heavy weapon fighters practicing on
the hangar deck.

The Russian Long Range Army (strategic bombers) Bear/Badger pilots
routinely conducted their graduation training exercise from the Murmansk/Kola
Gulf area by reconnoitering a U.S. Navy battle group enroute to or from the
Mediterranean. Of course, the Navy's task was to either elude identification or
rendezvous with the bombers and escort them while they were in the vicinity of
the battle group. (FYI, I did this on many occasions and usually found the
bomber crews had the latest issue of Playboy to hold up to their cockpit
window.)

On the occasion in question, Captain Clexton did call for the SCA fighters
to muster on the flight deck in armor and hold fighter practice. While I cannot
say NSTIW, I did hear the story from the horse's mouth....Captain Clexton.

Best wishes to all from a rather ancient mariner.
Thomas Smyth of Ayre

Subject: Re: True SCA Story?
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 1999 15:17:41 EST
From: JBRMM266@aol.com
To: etsmith@compuzone.net, sunnie@exis.net
CC: SCAVard@aol.com, atlantia@atlantia.sca.org

In a message dated 99-02-11 14:29:59 EST, etsmith@compuzone.net writes:

<< It's not often that anyone can lend credence to an urban legend. In this
case, the aircraft carrier was USS Nimitz (CV-68), the officer was Captain Ed
Clexton, USN who was then ommanding officer, and the SCA group was a Port
the name of which I cannot recall.>>

Its name was Currach Mór, which means "Big Boat". As the poursuivant of
Marinus, from which they then sailed, I assisted them with the design of
their Arms.

~Donal Mac Ruiseart

Subject: [Fwd: More True stories]
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 99 13:26:44 MST
From: rmhowe <magnusm@ncsu.edu>
To: joeb@locksley.com, ladycaviar@unidial.com,
MelanieWilson@compuserve.com, stefan@texas.net,
"Mark.S Harris (rsve60)" <rsve60@email.sps.mot.com>
, LIB_IMC@centum.utulsa.edu

This is Duke Badouin MacKenzie writing. Duke Gyrth OldCastle is the
Gyrth referred to.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: More True stories
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 1999 13:52:00 -0500
From: Peter Adams <redduke@earthlink.net>
To: "'atlantia@atlantia.sca.org'" <atlantia@atlantia.sca.org>

Firstly, I think tha Vis's adventure's with the Nat Guard occurred
while he was a master at arms in the east, well before he had won any
crowns. He told me that story a lonnnng time ago. He was still
accounted the best pole fighter this side of the Mississippi, though, at
that time. It is very possible that oral tradition has added in another
similar encounter, its not all that shocking really...

Another interesting story, also quite documentably true, dates from
very early in the East Kingdom's history.

Traveling home via the New York subways from and event somewhere in New
York, a party of one gentleman and an undefined number of ladies was
first harrassed (presumably they were "freaking the mundanes" as it used
to be called, and were in garb) and then set upon by a gang of subway
toughs. The gentleman, (it is my discredit that I can not recall his
name, however Gyrth knows all tells some...) held the exit stairs (with
weapons as diverse as a rattan sword to a pot metal dagger in oral
tradition) as best he could to effect the escape of the ladies. This
resulted in his (hopefully brief) hospitalization with major lacerations
(bike chains) and broken bones.

This warrior had been under observation by the Chivalry of the East,
the popular story is that he didnt look good enough to knight, based on
his combat skills. The actions he took to defend the ladies were enough
to convince the Chivalry of his essential Knightliness, and in fact he
was knighted for his valor.

Another story of Knighthood involves a US Airforce Serviceman in
-Denmark or Holland is it? wherever my namesake Baudouin is currently king-

He was an avid kayaker, and entered a significant race. It is
important to know that King Baudouin is an avid Kayak fan. The
serviceman and his partner knew no Walloon (the local language) and ran
the race as best they could, though they were impressed by the fortitude
of the local kayak racers, as there was one section of very rough water.
As they came around the final bend, the crowd went wild! Our Boys had
done us proud and won the race, beating all previous course records by a
considerable margin.

In fact, the King decided to knight them, did so, and Congress ratified
the foreign title.

The Kicker? Our Boys had kayaked (Tough word to parse there) right
past signs (in Walloon) that said "Dangerous water, must Portage"

Naytheless, Chevalier (insert name here, he did a CA on games) came
home and became a squire, and took his knight (so it is said) as his
modern squire, so in fact somewhere there is a knight who has a squire
who is a knight who has a squire that is a knight.

The Truth is Stranger than Fiction
Badouin

Subject: RE: More True stories
Date: Thu, 11 Feb 1999 20:12:17 -0500
From: E L Wimett <silverdragon@Charleston.Net>
To: "'atlantiaatlantiascaorg'" <atlantia@atlantia.sca.org>

> Poster: Peter Adams <redduke@earthlink.net> wrote

> Traveling home via the New York subways from and event somewhere in New
> York, a party of one gentleman and an undefined number of ladies was
> first harrassed (presumably they were "freaking the mundanes" as it used
> to be called, and were in garb) and then set upon by a gang of subway
> toughs. The gentleman, (it is my discredit that I can not recall his
> name, however Gyrth knows all tells some...) held the exit stairs (with
> weapons as diverse as a rattan sword to a pot metal dagger in oral
> tradition) as best he could to effect the escape of the ladies. This
> resulted in his (hopefully brief) hospitalization with major lacerations
> (bike chains) and broken bones.

> This warrior had been under observation by the Chivalry of the East,
> the popular story is that he didnt look good enough to knight, based on
> his combat skills. The actions he took to defend the ladies were enough
> to convince the Chivalry of his essential Knightliness, and in fact he
> was knighted for his valor.

Baudouin, the knight in question was Koppel fun Baurieux who ws
knighted on 18 March, 1970, in a world much simpler than our own. Koppel
later moved to Trimaris (and was still there the last time I saw him). He
was active as a herald for years in both kingdoms and I saw him at heraldic
symposia frequently. (One of the first and few men to wear a stringed cap
in the proper manner, which is what many people knew him best for. A truly
modest and gracious man with a very quiet demeanour.)

Alisoun (erstwhile Clerk of Precedence and history maven)

Subject: More SCA Stories
Date: Fri, 12 Feb 1999 03:29:28 -0500
From: nix@iolinc.net (Malone, N.)
Organization: Management Resources
To: Merry Rose <atlantia@atlantia.sca.org>

This one hasn't become an Urban Legend Yet but It should. In 1989 a
friend and fellow scadian was working temporarily in Miami. he was thew
store manager for several fastfood restaurants that were opening in the
region. Each day he escorted the Bank deposit to be tallied by the
bank's bookkeepers. I was visiting and road along as he made rounds one
day. Several of the store and the Branch the final deposit was made at
were in VERY bad neighborhoods. As we often worked security type jobs I
knew he had a carry permit. But, his light shirt made it obvious that he
did not have a gun. He made the pickups from the drive-thru's but had to
exit the car to get into the bank ( about 60 yds). When he got out, he
drug a huge very fantasy type Axe out of the back floor. Well I had to
ask, so he replied, " Everybody has a gun around here, Nobody is afraid
of guns in this neighborhood. they expect you to have a gun and just
bring more. But you got to be a f------ nutcase to carry an axe, and
people are really scarred of crazies!" No Shit There I Was!

AshaHito

Subject: Chivalry and Courtly Behavior
Date: Thu, 18 Feb 1999 22:50:32 EST
From: SCAEtain@aol.com
To: atlantia@atlantia.sca.org

There was this guy I know who was attending his first-ever Pennsic as an
archer. He was new to the SCA and had only been shooting for a couple of
months. He wasn't really that good, but he was pretty enthusiastic about it
and had managed to get included in the Baroness' Guard for his home Barony.
The only thing this meant was that he was going to go shoot at the same time
as the other members of the Guard, with the many of the rest of the Barony
looking on for support.

When the Guard arrived at the Clout shoot, this guy suddenly stopped and asked
one of the ladies there if he could borrow a pen. He then pulled six arrows
from his quiver and proceeded to mark them up. When asked what he was doing,
he explained that it occurred to him that there were six ladies who were
providing him his inspiration that day -- his Queen, the Crown Princess, a
territorial Princess, his Baroness, his lady at home who could not come to
war, and a lady from his Barony who had given him her favor when no other Lord
had offered to bear it to the field for her. He was going to shoot an arrow
for each lady, and had marked them with their initials so he could keep them
straight later.

The Guard approached the line, and the arrows were loosed. As he shot each of
his arrows, he spoke aloud the name of the lady that particular arrow belonged
to. Those who were looking on thought it was a little corny, but still kinda
touching. When they were done shooting, the range was closed as the marshals
took to the field to tally the scores. The archers were then released to
retrieve their arrows.

Word came down the hill to the Barony that he had shot a six! And back up the
hill went a great cheer! A lord who was present was also member of the King's
household. He insisted that this guy present the arrows to each lady for whom
he had shot, and made arrangements for audiences with each of the Royals.
Rumor has it that when he presented an arrow to one of the Princesses, she
was so taken by his simple act of chivalry that she wept.

Etain ingen Thadgain (of Dun Carraig and Lochmere)
(that's AY-den)

Date: Sun, 14 Feb 1999 09:14:41 -0500
From: James Gilly / Alasdair mac Iain <alasdair.maciain@snet.net>
Subject: SC - OT - [fwd] Re: True SCA Story

Off topic, but amusing. Forwarded from the Merry Rose - part of a thread
which started with the story of Duke Vissevald's pugil-stick exploits in
the Army.

>From: Erikawful@aol.com
>Date: Sat, 13 Feb 1999 08:41:28 EST
>To: atlantia@atlantia.sca.org
>Subject: Re: True SCA Story

magnusm@ncsu.edu writes:
> > Flieg is also fond of what happened to Theoderick of Skane one
> > day. Theoderick pulled into a 7-11 lot and as he got out of his
> > car three young tuoghs came toward him. He'd been fighting for a
> > few months at the time. He reached into the back seat and pulled
> > out a field-legal sword. One of the toughs took one look and told
> > his friends-- "Look out! He's SCA! He'll beat the shit out of us!"
> > Needless to say--the gang left abruptly.
> >
> > --Hal
>
>From the book "Pool Cues, Beer Bottles, and Baseball Bats, a manual of
>expedient weapons", by Marc ("Animal") MacYoung:
>
>In one section of the book he describes various stances you might see in an
>opponent during a fight - watch out for kendo jocks, fencers, etc. Then comes
>a sketch of something looking vaguely Oldcastle-ish, described as "the SCA
>stance". Quoting as best I recall,
>
>"Remember those medieval types I mentioned in an earlier chapter? If you see
>this stance, DON'T GO NEAR THE GUY. It's goofy-looking, but if you get in
>range, you'll get your ass blasted across the county line. Problem is, you
>don't know WHICH county line it'll be. They can hit you from any direction..."
>
>He also suggests looking the SCA up for training in full-contact sword and
>polearm.
>
>Erich

Laird Alasdair mac Iain of Elderslie
Dun an Leomhain Bhig
Canton of Dragon's Aerie [southeastern CT]
Barony Beyond the Mountain [northern & southeastern CT]
East Kingdom

Subject: Chivalry and Courtly Behavior
Date: Thu, 18 Feb 1999 22:50:32 EST
From: SCAEtain@aol.com
To: atlantia@atlantia.sca.org

Word came down the hill to the Barony that he had shot a six! And back up the
hill went a great cheer! A lord who was present was also member of the King's
household. He insisted that this guy present the arrows to each lady for whom
he had shot, and made arrangements for audiences with each of the Royals.
Rumor has it that when he presented an arrow to one of the Princesses, she was
so taken by his simple act of chivalry that she wept.

Etain ingen Thadgain (of Dun Carraig and Lochmere)
(that's AY-den)

Date: Fri, 07 May 1999 13:16:19 -0500
From: a14h@zebra.net (William Seibert)
Subject: SC - OT & OOP, ha!!

This once occurred at a past multi-day event. A person, rather
famed for his ability to prepare sumptuous feasts, had agreed to
prepare a farewell feast for his household and their guests. The
feast in question was to occur on the next to last day of the
event. You know, the day before the pack-the-hell-up-and-get-out
day. Anyway, the night before, said famous cook had been
imbibing rather to extreme, and as a result, was still sleeping
when those fortunate gentles who had "volunteered" to assist
showed up. First fortunate gentle went into cook's tent to
awaken him. "Nudge, nudge", and the somnolent cook took a swing
at the not-so-fortunate gentle with a cleaver, narrowly missing
taking off his head. Famous cook didn't even wake up. I guess
maybe he was pretty fortunate at that. Volunteers went into a
huddle, and ended up begging a passing Duke to awaken the cook.
Duke armored up in full plate, went into the tent and came out
with huge gouges in his plate. "No way am I waking that guy up"
was his comment. Another huddle, and an impromptu drum circle
was formed, to no avail. But the drum circle did awaken the
cook's mother, who wanted to know what was going on at this
un-godly hour of the morning. The facts of the situation were
carefully, tearfully explained to her, and she went into her
son's tent. A few minutes later, out came previously mentioned
famous cook, with no adverse consequences to his mother. Thus
proving, "you can't nudge a cook like his mother."

(names withheld to protect the insolent, namely me)
wajdi

Date: Thu, 8 Jul 1999 12:16:16 -0700 (PDT)
From: Laura C Minnick <lainie@gladstone.uoregon.edu>
Subject: Re: SC - Verjuice

On Thu, 8 Jul 1999 LrdRas@aol.com wrote:
> lainie@gladstone.uoregon.edu writes:
> << The funny thing is the Nutrition
> Information on the side- the numbers are based on an 8 oz portion. Linda
> remarked that she doesn't know anyone who would willingly drink a glass of
> the stuff...

> Why? Sounds like a story....:-)

Not really. Just the idea of drinking it like regular juice, or like I put
away juice (ALOT!) makes me shudder.

Does remind me of a story though- several years ago (7?8?) at a Ducal War,
Duke James Greyhelm showed up with an army, rather upsetting the planned
kettle of D.Gunnar vs. D. Tjorkill. As there had been jokes in the copy
about eating rattan, James brought a small jar of pickled rattan shoots-
not bamboo, rattan. But James had to leave before final court, so one of
the knights fighting with him, Sir Paul of Somerton, got to present the
jar to Gunnar and Tjorkill. They were (understandably) wary and suggested
that he eat some first. Being game and on the spot, he pulled one out and
popped it in his mouth, smiled wide and said "Yummy!" (He said later it
tasted like...pickled rattan. Vile.) He passed the jar to Tjorkill, who
grabbled one, chomped, and fixed Paul with a "you sonofa..." before
turning to the crowd and Gunnar with a grin and a "Hey! This is really
good!" (born actor). So Gunnar pulls a piece out, sticks it in his mouth,
gets the 'I've been had' look on his face, yells "Puwah!" and spits it
out. The crowd loved it and Paul and Tjorkill had a good laugh. Too bad
James missed it. But then, they would've just had to kill him...

Why is it the 'old days' are best when they're gone?...

'Lainie
- -
Laura C. Minnick

From: "Tom Pilcher" <jamesllewellyn@home.com>
Newsgroups: rec.org.sca
Subject: Re: SCA Urban Myths
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2000 07:06:02 GMT

A few years ago we had an incident in the Port of Crickstow-on-sea (then
Laighe na greine) in the Shire (now Barony) of Seagirt (gee there's a legend
in itself) at an event that was labelled "Come as your favourite Hero or
Heroine (not little white bags) from History, Real or Fictional." Four of us
dressed up as the 3 1/3 Musketeers in very nice outfits patterned after the
Keefer Sutherland version.

Sometime during the evening the alarm went off in the closed convenience
store across the street.
I was on gate and grabbed my cell phone and the other 3 musketeers and we
responded, all carrying quarterstaves, dialling 911 as we ran. The
perpetrator was long gone but we secured the area and waited for the Police
to arrive. The look on their face when they arrived was awesome. It took
them a long time to get out of their car for here in front of a store with
an alarm wailing are 4 musketeers with staves watching in all directions.
Apparently witnesses testified to seeing the perpertrator running like a
scared rabbit as d'Artagnan and his bunch ran across the highway.
--
HL Sgt James Llewellyn ap Gruffydd
jamesllewellyn@home.com
250-216-6346

<the end>